funny adult chat

1) Had hair so annoying you kept blowing it out of your eyes/face? 2) Had wind caught in your hair and had to keep flipping it away? 3) Changed a diaper?

Let's have some fun, post your most ridiculous RP setups. Doesn't have to be sexual, must be weird. for example: I'm the last loaf of bread in the bread aisle at the store, you're the haggard mom of two coming in to get supplies for lunches tomorrow, must be able to describe the sensation of...