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Starting Conversations in a Chat Room

Do you struggle to find the right words to use when approaching a stranger in a chat room? I know how nerve-racking it can be. I have found that a good introduction is the key to successfully starting a conversation with another chatter, and have learned a few methods that you can employ to shore up your chances of engaging with new friends or prospective romantic interests.

Introducing Yourself to Chatters

When you start a conversation with someone you've never had a chat with before, it is customary to introduce yourself. There are many ways that you can approach this, but remember to keep it focused on the most interesting details about you and what you're looking for. You won't become an expert at this right away, but as you chat more, you'll come to understand which details people want to know and which are irrelevant. For instance, the fact that you are tall may be interesting and attractive, but your exact height is only necessary if asked. As you get better at introductions, your chance of getting responses from interesting people increases.

A Chat with a Mysterious Stranger

Your introduction should be full of compelling information about you -- not too much to read casually, but not so little as to be completely uncompelling. One technique that you can use involves employing mystery. Do tell others about yourself, what you like, and what you dislike, but don't include your life story and how you arrived at your tastes. "Leave them wanting more" is a double-edged sword, in that it requires you to give them enough to get a taste first.

Brevity is the Soul of Wit

While an introduction does not have to fulfill any particular length requirement -- it's a chat room, not a college essay -- an introduction that is too short will not be effective. When Shakespeare said that brevity is the soul of wit, he followed: "And tediousness the limbs and outward flourishes, I will be brief." Perhaps you see irony in this, but if you look more closely, you might find it to indicate that brevity must not be too brief. Make sure you say what you need to say, at the very least! For instance, in the chat rooms, "hi" is not compelling in the least, and will usually be met with silence. Find the briefest way to elicit a response.

Stand Out

One of the most important ways to get the attention that you want in a chat room is to stand out. Demonstrate your value, your vocabulary, and your intelligence. Elevate yourself in the eyes of others by daring to be different. You have total control over your presentation in chat rooms, so while the others try introducing themselves by listing statistics about their anatomy, you should be creative instead!

Respect Given, Respect Earned

If you want to meet and chat with new and interesting people, respect is key. You'll never make new friends by ruining someone's day. An important thing to remember is that, when you introduce yourself and talk about what you're into, because of the nature of chat rooms, you're already imposing on someone with a new private message that they weren't expecting. That's a disadvantage that you have to work against by being especially considerate. Some tips: - When you talk about what you're into, if it's an uncommon interest, or typically perceived as strange, being overly graphic and detailed about it may be too much for some chatters to handle. Consider how others may respond, and alter your approach based on what kinds of reactions you get. - Your niche interests aren't for everyone, but be careful not to imply that this makes you special, because you are making a contrasting statement at the same time: Anyone who is not into what you're into is not smart, sophisticated, cultured, and so on. Be careful that your introduction doesn't insult people who aren't interested.

Chatting Goes Both Ways

One of the worst things you can do is to give your prospective chat partners the idea that you want them to do all the work. Chat is a two way street, and if you can't ask questions about your partner, you are indicating that you don't acknowledge this fact. If you do nothing but make declarative statements, you are treating your partner as if you expect them to do all the work. Ask questions in order to engage your partner, and not only will the conversation keep ticking along, but you'll be demonstrating that you care what they're saying, too -- this is another way to show respect.

Some examples of successful Introductions include:

  • "Hi, my name is Frank and I'm from New York. I'd love to chat with some fun-filled ladies tonight."
  • "Hi, I'm new to this chat room. I'm looking for a male who knows how to talk to a lady."
  • "Good evening everyone. Are we all having a great time?
  • "Single female looking to chat with a man with a strong and sexy voice. Are you out there?"
  • "Hi, I'm Hanna. I love to engage in a sexy phone chat. Would you be interested?"

This may seem like a lot to consider, but we're confident that not only can you apply all of this advice, given time and practice, but that employing these techniques and considerations will earn you more attention, more success, and more fulfilling chat partners. When you make other peoples' chat experiences more engaging, you, too, will have more fun and gain more enjoyment from our chat rooms.