Explain a movie badly

Lots of trucks, horrible cop with a grudge and a duck.

Convoy
 
Maniacal chocolate maker invites children to his factory and feeds them hallucinogens and lies

Charlie and the Chocolate Factory
 
This tiny guy needs to walk trough all kinds of fucked up enemies just to throw a shitty piece of jewelery into some lava or something, instead of just going there with some eagles and that wizzard or what ever that old ass guy is, but nooooo we need to make 10 hours of movie

Lord of the Rings
 
Some lady who is fucked up pretty dies like a dumb bitch by eating a apple or some shit that some witch gave her that talks to furniture*cough cough psychopath*, or what ever cant remember what kind of fruit it was could have been a banana.

And oh yeah before she dies she took care of 7 tiny dudes who work in some sort of mine and get fucked up rich from diamonds and such.

And then gets kissed by a homeless guy or was it a prince? Oh what ever she gets back to life from a kiss like uhm yeah sure bitch!!

Snow White
 
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