D_go
Resident From Gotham! No... I'm lying.
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I love me some Taylor Swift. But let's go 49ers
If Stan was one of the Baldwin brothers which one would he be?
Just for the hell of it I've been talking with a Southern accent at work all day today
If I could have one superpower it would be to freeze time just so I could take longer naps
I wont lie...Sometimes I'm scared I'll say the wrong things
We're having a meeting today at work so I planned ahead.. I brought a bag full of snacks.
Popcorn is the only food that doesn't make crumbs but yet still makes a lot of mess
Im not even trying to be cool..... Swear.
Your standards are the reason for her not standing next to you... and vice versa
I just walked outside... somebody's barbecuing and it smells good
You got a new boyfriend huh? Don't settle you can do a lot more worse.....like me >: )
I keep saying I'm going to stop eating ice cream.. but I just can't
Everyone has nothing but bad things to say about the the devil... Ive never met the S.O.B so I wouldn't know.
Wait... What the F*** , a smart toilet?
I scraped the curb today, Ahhh that hurt.
It's almost 5:00 in the morning an McDonald's has a line already. Got to love them Egg McMuffins.
Damn that bird took a massive s*** on my windshield
I dint even read it but im still gonna press like. -
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