Funny Predictive Text

Hey, that better not he a ploy to get this young woman to stay out of sight.

Do you
 
Perhaps i should follow you into the bed and let me see if I could get away with you.

Ohhhhhhh dear me

If only I pushed instead of pulled
 
I often say that you are too busy and have no idea what the hell is going on with the bowel cancer but I don't think I can get a new toothbrush and you'd have to be a good girl in the future

Don't touch that, that's my...
 
Don't touch that, that's my favorite thing to say about the whole situation right now lol


Step into my lair and let thy eyes feast upon my
 
Step into my lair and let thy eyes feast upon my heart and soul as you walk through my room to find me in my bed with your arms crossed

I believe the most important thing in life is…
 
I believe the most important thing in life is that you are not going to be able to get a new job and the kids are being dickheads

See that? That's your...
 
See that? That's your choice to do what you're comfortable with doing so that you're able to make a difference in life


Show your tongue again and I'll
 
Dip your toe in the pool and get your head out of your mouth


That's preposterous. You're such a
 
That’s preposterous. You’re such a hypocrite that you’re trying to be funny and not even remotely offensive

Get in the car and put…
 
Get in the car and put your clothes away so you can take a nap before your appointment tomorrow morning at eight o clock

How many times do I have to tell you that
 
How many times do I have to tell you that you are a great person and I will do the best I can do to help you to grope your bum

Don't you just love it when...
 
Don't you just love it when people ask you to take care of their pets and then they don't care about your pet

There isn't a single person on this planet who I wouldn't
 
There isn’t a single person on this planet who I wouldn’t trust to have a conversation with on this topic

I nearly choked…
 
I nearly chocked on my phone when I was trying to get a new battery for it


Why did the chicken cross the road? Because the chicken needed
 
Why did the chicken cross the road?
Because the chicken needed to be a good time to get the boss of the day

His nipples stiffened as I....
 
His nipples stiffened as I watched him fall from his seat and the door closed to his face

Miasma juice
 
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