Funny Predictive Text

All of the sudden, everything is falling apart in the middle of nowhere and you just want me there and be happy with you for the rest of your life


I broke the matrix, and now
 
I broke the matrix, and now I’m stuck with a bunch of people who are just as dumb as you guys.

This one time in Norway…
 
This one time in Norway we were talking about a man who had been in prison and he was trying so desperately not to get arrested for the same crimes as the others he committed against

I've never had a
 
I’ve never had a bad experience with the other two but I’ve heard of people having problems getting their hands to the ground when they’re not properly trained

Train me to…
 
Train me to be your best friend and you won't regret that you are the only man who will make you happy and you deserve the best for yourself because you're the only man that will love you forever and ever and ever and ever and forever and always

Love me like
 
If I’m not back in five minutes, just call the number I need and I can go over to your place to get it for the new car.

This tea tastes like
 
When you’re asleep I just wake up to see your beautiful face and then I wake you up to see my gorgeous body in your arms like a dream come true

Turnips…
 
Turnips and the cheese is melted in my face when you are not in the cheese box with your feet up in the cheese

Apparently I like cheese so let's......
 
Apparently I like cheese so let’s see what happens when we go out to dinner and then we go back to bed so we can eat together.

A room full of Santa’s and all I want is
 
A room full of Santa's and all I want is to inform you that I just had a good idea and it's not a good idea but obviously it is a good idea

I need to sleep so I don't....
 
I need to sleep so I don't wake up early tomorrow night but I'll try and wake up tomorrow morning if that's possible for your schedule thank goodness for the weather it's been nice out here today

Wrestle me again and I'll
 
Wrestle me again and I'll be in touch with your friends and tell them that you have to learn how to make a decent lasagne with so many people in your mouth

Never underestimate the power of....
 
Never underestimate the power of the people in your own home or in your own life

There's nothing that I can
 
Let me know when it's time to get in touch with you about your appointment for your surgery tomorrow morning and I'll be sure that you get that information from the doctor so that you don't forget about that appointment

Take your hand out of my underpants and
 
Take your hand out of my underpants and I will take the batteries out of the couch and then tell you how to kick a huge spider

The first thing I think of when I see you is....
 
The first thing I think of when I see you is that you’re not a real man and you’re just a little bit too old for me

My Christmas tree fell off the…
 
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