Funny Predictive Text

You are the most important person in this country right now so please don't forget about me I'm going home now to take my medicine to get ready for my surgery tomorrow morning at six

No, that's not true. This is what really happened: I was
 
No, that’s not true. This is what really happened: I was just trying to be clear about what I wanted and how much I wanted it done to me so it wouldn’t happen again because I didn’t know if you had any other options other than to get a different name

When the sun shines we’ll shine…
 
When the sun shines we'll shine on the horizon like the stars are falling from our eyes as we gaze into the night skies

Under my desk, I have so
 
I wake up at the same time every day with my eyes open like a little girl in my eyes

Your mouth is my mouth, so just
 
I wake up at the same time every day with my eyes open like a little girl in my eyes

Your mouth is my mouth, so just
 
Please just give me your phone number so that we can get on our way to your house to pick up your stuff for the weekend and then I'll get back to your place to drop off your stuff

Generals gathered in their masses, just like
 
Finished with my woman cause she said I'm not a woman and she didn't even know what she meant so now I'm just going to be mad and go back home to my husband because she doesn't like me anymore

Let me fucking
 
I can't help myself when I'm feeling like this but it's not the end of the world for us to get to the point of being able to see the light

Your throat, my
 
My secret fetish is to keep it in my mouth for a few hours before eating it with the rest of your body

Take the old off, but don't
 
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