Game Scattergories - 3 items

  • Glowing urine (Don't ask me what that sob drank)
  • Granite pulverized into an award winning milkshake that is strawberry- banana flavored with an aftertaste of chalk
  • Goat cheese that's been left out of the fridge for too long. Who am I kidding? I consider it weird in general o_O
Ways to stay sane while with your family for the holidays R
 
High definition screen...because on standard definition every image is hideous(ok I can't tell the difference really)

Help from an expert...you know the type of person that always deals with sharpening an image.

Hand pain relief from led lights...found on the sharper image site.
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Ways to confuse people.

Q
 
Hair did - styled above and maintained below
Heart shaped glasses at a festival
Hippy flower ring in your hair brightens up ANY occasion

Threadit:
Quick flailing of limbs
Quiche throwing randomly in public places
Quiet air guitar solos

Curse words that fly out LOUD when you kick your toe on wooden furniture during the night ~ W
 
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Bending over in front of them with no pants/knickers on
Bringing out the sex toys
Bashing your cock off her forehead whilst she is trying to watch tv - playfully like!!

Ways to tell someone that you're sorry - T
 
Calling their name repeatedly.
Crawling on the ground like an animal dragging it in your teeth
Covertly removing all of your clothes, duct taping some wings on your back, gluing a bow to your head, jumping out and saying"how's this for your Christmas gift!"

Things that you want to look at for hours
E
 
Mediocre gifts are the best to give...you can always improve, but the expectation is set.

Meaningful gifts are good, however they don't fit into the first category without a fair amount of thought and planning, making it to difficult...best stay away from this category until you're an expert in mediocrity.

Made gifts are fantastic, as they cost little money usually, however the time to complete can vary. If you indeed make a gift, which is one of my favorite things to do...make sure you do it in a mediocre manner. Cheap materials and crappy craftsmanship are key.


Materials to make mediocre gifts from

G. (This should be easier!)
 
Gum..previously chewed..a bonding agent used by little kids who were told "make something..use your imagination"

Glitter..unless you're making for a stripper or grandparent..then it might fall into the meaningful category

Gum drops..you laugh but I have had these glued to paper before


Worst excuses to blow someone off for a date

T
 
"There was this thing I had to do...it was really important, and well, this thing couldn't wait...what thing? Oh I can't tell you it's private."

Texting them that you decided to take the bus to save the environment, and traffic was really bad, so you took another bus you thought was going to be faster, but it went the wrong way, and maybe another time would be better. But really you're sitting at home in your underwear watching reruns of friends masturbating to Rachel, and the lingerie section of a Sears catalog from the 1980s that you happened to find.

Telling them that you waited at the restaurant for over an hour and purposely giving the wrong restaurant name, not even one close by, thereby making sure they believe you to be thoroughly confused since you mixed up Panera (where you said you were) with Capital Grille (the e on the end makes it fancier).

Things you should never do on a date at a restaurant.

O
 
Order two dinners so you can bring one home to your significant other

Open your phone and get on a sex site o_O

Only order a salad because you're "not hungry"..and continuously pick food off your dates plate with your fingers

Things you find left behind at a movie theater

P
 
Licking tongue of @Goth

Lengthy pieces of wire...various shapes and sizes of course....you can use them for so many different things, twisting around your finger to cut off the blood supply, turning them purple to impress your friends, and possible medics who will provide their services. Or even fashioning a fish hook, just in case you didn't bring a snack.

Liquid nitrogen, nothing better to cool you down on a hot day then something that will freeze your hand solid in a matter of seconds!

Best songs to sing while shitting.
R
 
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