Banter Why Are They Single?

[Fildo66]

Because his dates at like his profile name …in shambles. The guy pulls a door and it’s a push door. Walks right into the glass door. And this is a restaurant he’s been to 30 times on dates. He drops his silverware and bonks his head coming up … spilling his dates drink on her. Goes to the bathroom with the tablecloth tucked in his pants and sends everything crashing to the floor. No magic trick here folks. Only thing he does right is sign the check but usually ends in a paper cut on a paperless tablet. Oh well .. it’s good comedy.

 

[Locket44]

He confuses the words deck, dick and dock and it can be awkward.

 

[Fildo66]

Speaking of confusing, she likes to see her dates before she introduces herself. For the example below, the part of @Locket44 will be played by a woman we will call Victoria. When she sees her blind date for the first time, and she doesn’t approve, he comes up and says, “You must be Victoria! My name is Charles. So good to finally meet you!” Comes in for a hug.
She steps back and says, “I’m sorry. Do I know you? My name is Amber.” And off she goes. Guess how many men know her as Amber? Here’s a hint … she’s still single.

 

[Tark5]

He confuses the words deck, dick and dock and it can be awkward.

then there's duck too.

 

[Saximony]

Cuz he refuses to follow rules

 

[Tender_n_Crispy]

Because he is out of tune and he thinks its awesome.

 

[Harley31]

He's out of tune and out of touch, the only thing he can play is the radio

 

[Tender_n_Crispy]

Because she has a dark humor and hangs around with clowns.

 

[BunnyBeeHope]

Couldn't get the ball gag out at the speed dating night

 

[Fildo66]

She tends to wear her strap on everywhere. And not just under her dress. That damn thing is on the outside like the kid that wears a jock strap for the first time. But this is intentional. It’s pretty damn intimidating!

 

[Stanthropical]

Talks too much shit.

 

[Lexi_79]

Because the alien can be scary

 

[Deleted member 1591184]

Because she was still in her bathtub when she was supposed to arrive at the restaurant for her date

 

[Saximony]

Because he thinks hes a mime and wont talk at all during dates but gets handsy anyways.

 

[Deleted member 1591184]

He doesn’t say goodbye. He hits the Baker Street sax riff and stares into the distance like he’s in an old detective film.

 

[Amelia24]

Cos he loves his food a little bit more than he should

 

[Saximony]

She lives in the red light district

 

[Tark5]

and his pocket's not fat enough.

 

[Tender_n_Crispy]

Because he is afraid that he will get his "T" shirt all messy again. So he hides away in the dark with rosy palm and her 5 friends.

 

[Tark5]

And 4 out of her 5 friends are in their 80s.