T
Thalassa
Guest
Most of that podcast made me simultaneously laugh so hard, shake my head and want to slap myself.
Sub Ask a sub
Most of that podcast made me simultaneously laugh so hard, shake my head and want to slap myself.
Funny enough I had the EXACT same reaction!
L
LillyK
Guest
Are you a forgiving person and generally like to please others or it this only in a romantic/sexual relationship? I LOVE to please my man but I am sassy & don't take being told what to do well LOL. I'm curious as to the psychology behind it & if there's certain personalities that are more prone to being a sub than others.
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Pistil
Guest
I much appreciate this discussion on a topic I have known little about and am finding fascinating (at least in words). Thanks.
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Thalassa
Guest
I took the liberty of relocating your question here
An interesting question... one I am having trouble finding a clear-cut answer to. Are we talking lifestyle D/s or bedroom/kink D/s? What is considered conventional? Does conventional mean the stereotypes of D/s? Why would a behavior or act be considered unconventional? And by whom?
I can only speak to the behavior of a 24/7 submissive. I suppose by "conventional", you mean the usual... obeying, kneeling, serving, offering her body to him, etc. Perhaps by unconventional, you mean a variation of all of that, a deepening of that D/s dynamic. A submissive who thinks about and understands fully what submission means and entails, and then offers it to that one person, may be unconventional if compared to some subs who have but a cursory understanding of it all. A submissive asking for protocols to be set out for her, may be acting unconventionally. Instead of the Dom bringing it up, she asks for it to be put in place. Instead of the Dom manipulating her into submission, he waits to see her develop and grow her submission till she begs, through words or through actions, to submit to him. Being inked for him, massaging him without him asking for it, going past what is expected of her, e.g. her studying the lifestyle... all ways maybe unconventional to some. A sub who begins to engage in writing out D/s stories, to give voice to her submissive soul, is acting out of the D/s norm. A sub who considers a major life adjustment for her Dom, and finds happiness and purpose in her now new world is doing more than just serving him his meals or falling to her knees.
For me, submission is submission, and every submissive has their own way to express it, based on who they are, their character, their past, their expectations, etc. As long as everything and anything the sub does, is for and with his/her Dominant in mind, it is an expression of her love and bond to the Dom. What may be considered unconventional to some, may just be the norm to a couple.
To me submissive means you are willing to do whatever the dominant one requires you to do
Whether it’s a certain position or sexual act
What excites you about being submissive
Was wondering if there is a trigger to the submissive or if you take general state of want. I hope that makes sense. I guess I'm curious as to how much of one's life is dedicated to a submissive stance or is it a silent agreement between the submissive and a dominant partner
99 percent of the time they have no idea what this lifestyle means... it's just a fun word for guys to say to trick themselves into thinking they are a Dom...
C
County
Guest
Alot of guys here use the title 'Dom' as an excuse to control and manipulate potential submissives...in sometimes they cruelest of ways...so no they are not tricking themselves, they are abusing the title.
T
Thalassa
Guest
I'm not understanding this part...
Trigger when? You mean how does someone end up identifying as sub? In general? Or purely during sex?
General state of want of...? You mean lust?
Different people will have different answers to this. Please bear in mind that my answers here are merely my own reflections and experience, and certainly not the words of all. Some people are sub only, others are sub/Dom (switches). Some are lifestyle subs (i.e. part of their identity, therefore a 24/7 way of being). Some are bedroom subs. For lifestyle D/s, it is definitely not a silent agreement. No way can you have a working D/s relationship without communication, the latter being a cornerstone of any relationship of whatever label. If you are talking about sex with a non-regular / one night stand partner, then I suppose that would be an implicit agreement. The dominance/ submission power play would be categorized as more of a 'sexual preference' or kink.
Trigger when? You mean how does someone end up identifying as sub? In general? Or purely during sex?
General state of want of...? You mean lust?
Different people will have different answers to this. Please bear in mind that my answers here are merely my own reflections and experience, and certainly not the words of all. Some people are sub only, others are sub/Dom (switches). Some are lifestyle subs (i.e. part of their identity, therefore a 24/7 way of being). Some are bedroom subs. For lifestyle D/s, it is definitely not a silent agreement. No way can you have a working D/s relationship without communication, the latter being a cornerstone of any relationship of whatever label. If you are talking about sex with a non-regular / one night stand partner, then I suppose that would be an implicit agreement. The dominance/ submission power play would be categorized as more of a 'sexual preference' or kink.