Beyond the Profile Post

Shadowfire said:
A quiet living room, laying on the couch, head resting on her lap.

Fingers gently running through my hair, the warmth spreading from her thigh, skin soft, smooth, delicate. My neck and ear, warming my mind.

Soft light from the corner lamps, resting my eyes.

A smile on our faces, calm and happy!
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Pale shadows crept effortlessly across the softly-lit living room floor and all was quiet and still. << 'a quiet living room'

make it sing.. put some life into it.. reach our, grab the reader.. make them crave... more

Its a nice sentiment though.. *sighs*

Ls x
 
See this is what makes this idea great. We can post and have nudges, more ideas to feed it..
 
Lakeside said:
Pale shadows crept effortlessly across the softly-lit living room floor and all was quiet and still. << 'a quiet living room'

make it sing.. put some life into it.. reach our, grab the reader.. make them crave... more

Its a nice sentiment though.. *sighs*

Ls x
Click to expand...
Kept it simple to start with, bring in more casual readers as well as writers like yourself, hopefully, an image only to be expanded upon . It worked you did expand on it;)

It is yes, one to settle the mind and body.
 
My stuff is always a WIP. I go back and tweak it, slide things around. But for now its a start.


Standing to face to the sun I feel its gentle warmth upon my skin. Senses alive I can smell the sea, always like a homecoming it pulls me to its shore.

Wiggling my toes I feel the cool sand below them, the ground squelching as I continue to wiggle my toes. The crease of a smile creeps slowly across my face.

The smell of the salty air drags me closer to my own type of heaven.

Opening my eyes I push errant hair from my eyes, tousled by the gentle breeze and stare out to sea. Home again, my batteries recharging despite how cold it is.

Looking around I don’t see many people, but it’s still early, the sun just creeping over the horizon, its warmth slow, lazy. But later when it’s higher the beach will fill, children with buckets and spades will race around laughing. But for now, the gentle sound as the water laps against the sand is just mine to enjoy..
 
I keep walking up the hill, my dog pulling on her lead, spurring me on a little more. As the houses fall behind us, the smooth road turns to a stony track.
All I can hear is the stones crunching under my boots, and the wind rustling through the trees. It's autumn, so the trees display a beautiful range of colours, so pleasing to my eyes. I find it fascinating how much the sunlight and shadows can change the colour on one leaf.
A spider has made its web in one if the smaller trees, I only notice as dew covers the threads, making them glisen when the sunlight appears from behind the clouds, which are billowing across the sky.
My dog pulls on her lead, I hear the chank of the metal, which brings me out of my thoughts.
A big gust of wind suddenly blows from behind us, sending my long hair into a frenzy of activity, and I smell rain on the breeze.

Amature stuff I'm sure, I haven't used my writing skills for anything purposeful for a long time.
 
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Standing still, completely silent. I close my eyes and breathe in deep. I stand alone at this midnight hour. The only company, a symphony of crickets.

The chill in the breeze lift the hairs on my skin, and my flesh to pebble. Sending a shiver right through me. Wrapping my arms around, holding myself, as if I am enough to keep warm. My body quivers, as the dampness of the night seeps deep to my bones.

Tilting my face up to the heavens, willing the moon to come out from behind the massive clouds. Begging it to shed some light in this darkest hour. For it is dark, to dark to see the hand before you. I am alone, once again all alone.
 
FlyBaby said:
Standing still, completely silent. I close my eyes and breathe in deep. I stand alone at this midnight hour. The only company, a symphony of crickets.
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I really like that, some great images in it. Gives the feeling of the situation as well.

Loving what everyone is throwing out. Really glad I started this thread now.

If you edit your post, feel free to just repost it. Better that way than it could be missed..
 
witchygirl said:
Laying in the early morning darkness the sound of gentle water running awakens me, my heart beats faster remembering how his hands felt. Opening my eyes and he's standing before me with love in his eyes... i pull him back in for 1 more..... hug xx
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Nice I'd swap running and water around simply because it flows.

In the before me with love, you could just drop the word with throw a comma after me and it's a nice lead into it. Just helps with the flow.

How about adding how looking there makes you feel, do you smile at him?

But loving the feel of it. And what's good is I bet you can close your eyes and see, hear, feel, smell it..
 
Lupine said:
Nice I'd swap running and water around simply because it flows.

In the before me with love, you could just drop the word with throw a comma after me and it's a nice lead into it. Just helps with the flow.

How about adding how looking there makes you feel, do you smile at him?

But loving the feel of it. And what's good is I bet you can close your eyes and see, hear, feel, smell it..
Click to expand...


The feelings the words should invoke.
 
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