Banter Break Up With The User Above You

  • Thread starter Thread starter CantBeTamed
  • Start date Start date
Dear @FiveKnuckleShuffle

I don't know what ever possessed me to try this with you, I know I don't find you attractive, but there was something about you I couldn't resist...Ahh yes...no pants, the freedom you inspired in me. Now, I'm not normally attracted to men, and honestly, I'm still not, but something about you, those boots, and the various other outerwear you always display, well, it intrigued me, and no pants!

It started off fine, you, pantsless walking around the house, tracking mud everywhere, your coat covering your bits nicely...Those legs strong from working outside. But, it really gets tiring. All the laundry is my pants, my underwear, my socks, you're constantly showering but never putting on anything other than that damn coat, and boots. I appreciate your need to "save the environment because the water supply is strained with all of the Almond trees growing in California", but really, you belong more in a nudist colony than wherever the hell we are. ITS OK TO GET YOUR PANTS DIRTY, PUT SOME ON!!!

Now, I initially went into this whole thing with an open mind, thinking maybe I do like men, and I have to say, you helped me...helped me be sure, I'm sure this isn't going to work. I washed your coat, as my final parting gift, it was covered in cum stains, along with your hat, I just threw out the hat though, that thing was filthy. I know you're not upset, you never once tried anything with me, just the hat...that fucking hat.

Please, put the pants, which I left in every room of the house, on...put the underwear which I meticulously had sewn into your pants, on. And for the love of God man, get a new pair of boots!

Someguy
(not my best work here, I didnt have much to work with...post some random facts people!)
 
Jinxy, Dearest Jinxy,
I have really enjoyed the ride, the long walks on the beach, the candlelit dinners, the couples massages, all those night that you fell asleep as I watched you. Finding it so hard to believe how beautiful you truly are. The way the skin creases above your nose when you giggle. Anyway, I have decided that we are just not a fit for each other, don't get me wrong, the past three years has been amazing. But you have never even spoke to me in person, never answered one PM, I am tired of the sneaking around and watching you through windows. Our relationship is over.
Sorry, but you forced my hand. :)

This is meant to be a joke people!!!!!!!! :)
 
emptynestcpl said:
Jinxy, Dearest Jinxy,
I have really enjoyed the ride, the long walks on the beach, the candlelit dinners, the couples massages, all those night that you fell asleep as I watched you. Finding it so hard to believe how beautiful you truly are. The way the skin creases above your nose when you giggle. Anyway, I have decided that we are just not a fit for each other, don't get me wrong, the past three years has been amazing. But you have never even spoke to me in person, never answered one PM, I am tired of the sneaking around and watching you through windows. Our relationship is over.
Sorry, but you forced my hand. :)

This is meant to be a joke people!!!!!!!! :)
Click to expand...
Ohh damn. I was just waiting for this self isolation to be over to finally have the courage to approach you.
Oh well your decision is made. Guess it means I can stop trimming the bushes out in the yard now, so that’s a bonus.
 
Jinxy said:
Ohh damn. I was just waiting for this self isolation to be over to finally have the courage to approach you.
Oh well your decision is made. Guess it means I can stop trimming the bushes out in the yard now, so that’s a bonus.
Click to expand...
How I loved watching you trim your bush.
 
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