Banter Break Up With The User Above You

  • Thread starter Thread starter CantBeTamed
  • Start date Start date
@CantBeTamed
You musta been expecting this; I'm breaking up with you because you lied to me about the prize you've been awarded. I was just informed that the prize was not for being a creative writer; the Pulitzer Prize you were awarded was for the worst story, with all the reviewer agreed on that. You are a horrible liar and a horrible writer. Best wishes
 
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@Alexa79 girl as much as I love you . I found I got to let you go . See I like big hands from a man all over me and I like to have a dick deep in me and I have to have a deep intense orgasm. Hugs and one last kiss . Uhhh I hate that I must depart but I still love ya muah
 
@Shy_girl74 you have to admit it wasn't love it was lust. You were always there if my nut I must bust. But don't be sad or even dismayed. Cause you know its better we leave it this way. :)

@Jinxy I knew we were through the moment I became the one always making the coffee and the cushions were locked away when I came around with it. :p
 
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Dear @Shy_girl74 ,
We need to break up. I liked the fact that you are adventurous in the bedroom but when you parade around in that strap on ... well it makes me uncomfortable. Then you told me I should bend over and take it. That it wouldn’t hurt because you never complained when I went inside you. Now I know you were lying and I haven’t been able to sit for a week.
please find somebody else’s ass to violate.
Sincerely,
Fildo66
 
@Fildo66 We're breaking up because I sound like a broken record ... I've asked you one too many times to put all your things away when you've finished using them, let alone when I have family/friends coming over ... and NOT in random places, but together where they belong, locked away in the big combination access only metal suitcase under the bed!!

Last time I had my family around Mum went to make a cuppa and found a ballgag in the teabag tin, a douche in a coffee mug and a buttplug in the sugar! You know I was down for fun times in the kitchen but DAMN, your like a 3 year old! I really hope for your next partner's sake that you learn to put your fucking toys AWAY when you finish playing with them!

PS: You can keep em, I'm out!
 
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@PheonixxxMonroe look, we've had a good run but I feel like I can no longer compete with the main love in your life. I cannot compete with the fact that they are always there when you need them and they never argue with anything you say or suggest. I am quite shy and nervous about trying new and extreme things in bed but it seems they are up for anything and whenever you have used them in the bedroom you always seem fulfilled as nothing is off limits where they are concerned. I can no longer sit and listen to you bang on about their amazing silky smooth skin or how much more you enjoy using your lips to tease and suck them, I'm not normally a jealous guy but on this occasion I'm going to have to leave, its for the best as its eating me up inside - I sincerely hope that you and your blueberries have a happy life together, love 8.
 
@theoriginalnumber8
This I'm sure is a shock for everyone, you, me, all of FCN. But my dear friend, the time has come....

It all started when you drew that 8 on your hand not long ago, I mentioned how it reminded me of balls for your thumb penis...you looked at me in shock momentarily, and then became obsessed with stretching out your ligaments to achieve the helicoptering perfection of your thumb, which you promptly you tubed. You even incorporated your other hand playing with the 8 as the balls...the video went viral, and you bragged about it repeatedly, never mentioning that I might have had a little something to do with it. And now, your trademarked helicoptering of your thumb has caused issues...you can't grab a glass of water, a bottle, or ME without it slipping out of your hand.

The only other thing I'll mention this time, is that damn fax machine. Yes I know you got it when you were born, yes I know how they work, no I don't want to put my penis in the slot so you can use it as a blanket. And for something so special to you, you honestly don't take care of it that well. You constantly hit people on the head with it, and are in a never-ending cycle of widening and narrowing the slit.

At this point, I'll go back to playing hard to get, you might be able to win me over, after all, you have saved over 3000 pounds by stopping smoking....now if you could stop fucking the fax machine, that would be great. Having a toner covered dick does not make you attractive, it really only gets toner all over everything...

I'll see you on the threads(but not on our 200 thread count Egyptian cotton sheets those are mine 8!)

Someguy
 
Dear @superdude97 ,
I think we need to end whatever it is we have going on here. I think that there was a little confusion when we first started seeing each other. First off ... your name is a little misleading. You are not a super hero (or villain) which I thought at the time would be cool to date. Even though I might have to take it painfully once in a while it would be worth it. Kind of like the “Lois Lane” of relationships. I would be the guy dating the @superdude97 . Ok .. that sounds superficial and selfish but I thought it would be great.
and second of all ...I don’t believe having a huge cock counts as a super power. I mean it might be kryptonite to most ladies but I have to tell you ... that damn thing hurts. I am taking what pride (and asshole) I have left and leaving. Please don’t be hurt by this. It just wasn’t meant to be.
Good luck with that thing and don’t hurt the ladies.
Sincerely,
@Fildo66
 
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