Banter Can I ... ?

No. Bagels are junk food.

Can I disappear without a trace from FCN and tell nobody?
 
In under 72hrs? Yes, easily. Could probably do it 62 hrs with 6hr sleeps between 15hr drives, including stops for refueling and food.

Can I decide on vacation before memorial day and actually get the paid time off during that week, including paying a reasonable price for the vacation?
 
it's not likely, but you might get lucky if you can snag flights and accommodation after they get nervous about filling spots

can I order takeout for dinner, even though I went grocery shopping yesterday and have plenty to eat here?
 
No. I'm grilling dinner.

Can I stretch the kebabs I'll be grilling over four meals?
 
No. Scary.

Can I buy some fake Japanese kitchen knives from YouTube ads and pretend that I'm cool af?
 
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Can I have a piece of chili pepper chocolate now?
 

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