Explain how to.

To open a pinball machine up use the key to open the coin door or drill the lock if you lost the key. Reach to the top rail of the coin door and find a bar pull down on the bar they are usually old rusty and stuck. pulling the bar down will allow you to pull the stainless steel or chromed steel lockdown bar that covers the glass on top, pull it directly up. You can now Slide the glass out of its track towards you carefully though don't let it break in the middle. now you have access to all the plastic and rubber bumpers and can lift the Playfield up to access the components on the inside.
 

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How to become a more positive person

Listen to tool

How to become a stronger person

Listen to puscifer

How to become a wiser person

Listen to A Perfect Circle

How to become the best version of yourself

Listen to all three... Lol
 
How to make the perfect bourbon old fashion:

you will need: a rocks glass, bourbon of your choice, bitters, sugar cubes, sprite/7-up, and maraschino cherries, a fork, and a muddler

How To:

- drop two sugar cubes into the rocks glass and crush them to a fine powder with the muddler

- add a liberal amount of bitters on top of the crushed sugar cubes (till the sugar turns brown)

-pour a heavy splash of sprite/7-up over the sugar and bitters (it will foam up)

- add a spoon full of cherry juice from the cherry jar

- stir with a fork

- add 1-1/2 ounces (or more) of the bourbon of your choice

- top off with sprite/ 7-up

- add two cherries and another spoon full of cherry juice from the jar

- stir one more time with the fork

- sit down tip it back and enjoy

CHEERS!!!!!!!!!
 
How to procrastinate and perhaps prevent yourself from accumulating crap you don’t need:
  • Decide that you want the Apple Watch.
  • Add it to the shopping cart at Apple.com.
  • It wants to deliver (in two days) a day too early.
  • Fuck that—I need it a day later.
  • Don’t buy it.
  • Check the cart next day with intent to buy it, but delivery now changed to four weeks from now—I guess inventory is running low.
  • Fml.
  • Too pissed rite meow to order it.
  • Fuck you, Apple, I’ll deal with this tomorrow.
  • Check cart next day.
  • Delivery date is now six weeks.
  • Well, then... Fuck you too. Maybe I don’t need it anyway.
 
How to perform fellacio (non erotic version abridged.)

Place penis in hands
Hold it for 5 minutes
Suck tip for 2 minutes
Complain of jaw ache
Lick seductively while wishing you were watching Eastenders
Rub hard and fast so that he winces a little
Remove penis from hands
Allow penis to flop back down
Go and make the tea.

This is the only way to perform fellacio. If you start to enjoy it, smack your face immediately and leave.
 
Saximony said:
To open a pinball machine up use the key to open the coin door or drill the lock if you lost the key. Reach to the top rail of the coin door and find a bar pull down on the bar they are usually old rusty and stuck. pulling the bar down will allow you to pull the stainless steel or chromed steel lockdown bar that covers the glass on top, pull it directly up. You can now Slide the glass out of its track towards you carefully though don't let it break in the middle. now you have access to all the plastic and rubber bumpers and can lift the Playfield up to access the components on the inside.
Click to expand...
Alternatively get a hammer and strike the glass
 
Misha000 said:
How to perform fellacio (non erotic version abridged.)

Place penis in hands
Hold it for 5 minutes
Suck tip for 2 minutes
Complain of jaw ache
Lick seductively while wishing you were watching Eastenders
Rub hard and fast so that he winces a little
Remove penis from hands
Allow penis to flop back down
Go and make the tea.

This is the only way to perform fellacio. If you start to enjoy it, smack your face immediately and leave.
Click to expand...
Question: does it have to be Eastenders?
 
How to pull your shorts on’
Hold shorts by each side of the large hole
Hold them out about knee high
Put 1st leg through the big hole then through one of the smaller holes
Put 2nd leg also through the big hole and the remaining smaller hole
Pull up on each side pulling until the part you are holding is at waist level
Look in mirror
Remove them and start again when you realise you have put them on back to front
 
D_go said:
This came to me while I was running. Explain how to do something. You could be serious, be funny, you can be stupid about it, just explain how to do it, anything.
Click to expand...
This method is actually known as chaining, or task analysis. Commonly used in education to help children with learning difficulties or disabilities. It's harder than you imagine.
 
Misha000 said:
This method is actually known as chaining, or task analysis. Commonly used in education to help children with learning difficulties or disabilities. It's harder than you imagine.
Click to expand...
We had to do this as part of a communication test
We had to explain how to make a coffee
99 % of us, me included, forgot first step
“Open lid”
 
How to get people to be mad at you for no logical reason:

Refer to them as muppets and let them decide on their own wtf that means, because you don’t know either.
 
Misha000 said:
How to perform fellacio (non erotic version abridged.)

Place penis in hands
Hold it for 5 minutes
Suck tip for 2 minutes
Complain of jaw ache
Lick seductively while wishing you were watching Eastenders
Rub hard and fast so that he winces a little
Remove penis from hands
Allow penis to flop back down
Go and make the tea.

This is the only way to perform fellacio. If you start to enjoy it, smack your face immediately and leave.
Click to expand...
Made me literally laugh out loud! Thanks @Misha000 for a brilliant start to my day!
 
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