Jokes

When it's sunny I think 'Beer garden.'
When it rains I usually go to the pub for a while.
When it's snowing I like to sit in front of the TV with a case of Beer.
I'm starting to think I have a problem with the weather.
 
“When I was a kid I used to pray every night for a new bike. Then I realised that The Lord doesn’t work that way, so I stole one and asked him to forgive me.”
 
“Why do people point to their wrist when asking for the time, but don’t point to their crotch when they ask where the bathroom is?”
 
An older couple, who were both widowed, had been going out with each other for a long time.
Urged on by their friends, they decided it was finally time to get married.
Before the wedding, they went out to dinner and had a long conversation regarding how their marriage might work.
They discussed finances, living arrangements, and so on.
Finally, the old gentleman decided it was time to broach the subject of their physical relationship.
"How do you feel about sex?" he asked, rather tentatively.
"I would like it infrequently" she replied.
The old gentleman sat quietly for a moment, adjusted his glasses, then leaned over towards her and whispered, "Is that one word or two?"
 
“I was doing some decorating, so I got out my step-ladder. I don’t get on with my real ladder.”
 
TallulahBlue said:
[song time at centipede preschool]

head, shoulders, knees and toes, knees and toes, knees and toes, knees and toes, knees and toes, knees and toes, knees and toes, knees and toes, knees and toes, knees and toes, knees and toes, knees and toes, knees and toes, knees and toes, knees and toes, knees and toes, knees and toes, knees and toes, knees and toes.....
Click to expand...

Nooooo .. now the Wiggles are stuck in my head. Nooo

The Wiggles Nursery Rhymes - Head, Shoulders, Kne…:
 
You must log in or register to reply here.
Back
Top