Missed Connections

Missed connection(s):
Every single friggin' flight with transfer I took since october. Literally every flight. Both ways. Bomb threads, defect planes, pilot strikes, bad weather (a lot of it), bad luck... You name it...
 
Missed Connection: At the airport i fell asleep and when i woke up you were sitting next to me. I smiled at you and said hi, you smiled and giggled it was so sweet i hope you didn't see the puddle of drool that fell onto my crotch while i was sleeping:oops:
 
Missed connections

I’ve wanted to ask you out for months and after work we all go for our Friday night out. We are in a bar and you are talking about the new guy in the office. I go up to him when I see him at the bar ordering a drink and tell him he should ask you out.
You leave with him
5 minutes later your bff comes over and asks where you are
I tell her and she says but she likes you. She was going to ask you out
 
Missed connection: We had never met, but we had a mutual friend who got married yesterday. I'm the one who forgot to bring a wedding present but luckily there had recently been a fatal traffic accident nearby and so I nabbed a wooden cross and a teddy bear to give them for their wedding. For some reason, you and everyone else quit talking to me after they opened their present, so I never got a chance to tell you about myself. Anyway, I'm quirky and spontaneous - hit me up.
 
Missed connection: We had never met, but we had a mutual friend who got married yesterday. I'm the one who forgot to bring a wedding present but luckily there had recently been a fatal traffic accident nearby and so I nabbed a wooden cross and a teddy bear to give them for their wedding. For some reason, you and everyone else quit talking to me after they opened their present, so I never got a chance to tell you about myself. Anyway, I'm quirky and spontaneous - hit me up.

OMG! That is the funniest thing I have read, you are a riot :D
 
Missed connection: I walk past her almost everyday, (she doesn't seem to change clothes very often which i find somewhat strange) Where was I, Oh yeah to the quirky but interesting red headed beauty who is bare foot in blue jeans who makes me laugh without even knowing it I was going t0 say hi as you walked by but while looking your direction I face planted into a light pole and broke my nose. By the time i was able to focus you were gone. So this is my hello to you, next time i hope to have a clear walkpath
 
Missed Connections: at the gym you keep asking me if I need my water bottle filled and laugh at my dumb jokes. When leaving I tell the person behind the counter I like the new water girl program they just started. "What water girl program? We don't do that here" was his reply. Face palm
 
Missed connection: You were the tech support person who answered my call and at the end of the call you asked if there was anything else you could do for me, and I said yes you could come hand feed me Cheetos so my fingers don't get orange, and you must have accidentally hung up on me because we got disconnected.
 
Missed connection: hopped on the local bus to run three stops up, at the first stop you sat next to me, a stunning red head barefoot and in blue jeans, at first i thought it strange to be barefoot on a bus, but to each their own i figured. i knew there had to be a reason you sat next to me so i thought i would say hi, but the stupid bus driver hit a pot hole and i spilled my sweet tea all over your shirt and pants, i smiled and said sorry in a wierd voice and you grumbled something as you ran off the bus at the second stop. I still am not sure if you said son of a bitch or i will call you later, but i find it funny i didn't give you my number. so in case it was the latter of the two you can reach me at 60X_XXX-7645
 
Missed connection: You were my waiter and we were flirting with each other and then I lost my cool and screamed that I was going to sue y'all for false advertising when you brought me my cheese plate. You calmly explained that "cheese plate" describes the items on it, and not the plate itself, but I still smashed the "regular plate" over your head. When I came back the next day to apologize, there was some misunderstanding because they thought I had to stay 1000 feet away from you or something. Anyway, you can clear that up and hit me up sometime.
 
Missed connection: I was an aspiring magician ready to finally show off my skills and you were a volunteer in the audience. I said I was going to "saw you in half" and then I would pick a card (any card) that you were thinking of. But I fucked up the trick and actually really did saw you in half, so the card I picked was a "get well soon" card. Anyway, I haven't seen you since they wheeled you out on two stretchers. Hit me up.
 
Missed connection:

i was following behind you in the store last week and could not keep my eyes off you, A beautiful red head, bare foot in blue jeans. I remember thinking no shoes, no shirt, no service, but then thought well maybe it wasn't posted outside. Where was I? Oh yeah so i was following you aisle to aisle seemingly unnoticed, you called someone and said you needed help because you had a stalker following you around. I thought that was weird, and as i was going to approach you to offer my assistance i was nabbed and cuffed by two officers, apparently they thought I was some kinda stalker (still trying to figure out where they got that idea). Anyway in case you saw me and are interested, please reply to this classified post i'll be waiting and watching
 

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