Game when did you last..game

it was 15 - 20 years ago bud, i'm well over it. was the second weirdest date I ever had.

last time I felt confident with my body was more like 25 years ago. i was at school with a guy who is now a famous olympian. we weight trained every lunchtime at school, and on weekends. we skateboarded, skied, we were fit as fuck. there were a bunch of about 10 of us.

i sadly got a bit too into it. all the baggy trousers and vests, golds gym branded stuff. i mean, I was ripped and all, but still. you know what you are like when you are a teenager.

i had a big party when I was 17-18 and all the guys from school came, all the goths, all the this'es and thats - it wasn't like an american film but there were cliques......and all my mates from the village; rough as fuck mountain men.

i remember just getting the piss taken out of me all night while I was trying to impress women in my maroon adidas vest and tie-dye soft baggy trousers; melted on LSD.

after that I just started dressing normally.
 
When I saw my wax figure at Madame Tussauds.

When did you last eat cheesecake?
 
again, about 20 years back. been doing fuck-all since then it appears. bought some pills off a guy in a clandestine transaction. was meant to be 2 bags of 100, and when I got outta there it was about 70 in each bag - like a £300-450 burn.

bumped into him outside my club and asked him quite politely if he knew it was wrong, or what. he didn't even try to chat, went fucking ballistic.

next thing 4-5 of us plus bouncers are up against 4-5 of his mates.

just fisticuffs, everybody drunk and bouncers keeping the peace.

1-2 hours later, heading home, my mate came to pick us up. we pull up at traffic lights, and they are in the car beside us. it all kicks off again. but its all still limp-wristed threats. spills out across the road etc etc.

we all go home but they have my mate's car reg and the police picked him up 2-3 days later. he squealed like a pig. gave all our names and addresses. we ened up having to go hand ourselves in.

for some reason we all get asked about why one of them ended up smashed in the face repeatedly with a metal letterbox - to this day I don't know where that came from. it wasn't us, how would we have got a letterbox flap?? everyone is bemused.

gave a statement each and were out in 30 minutes. nothing was done.
 
In the shower. Every time bruh.

Life is good!!!! Dance it away. Naked, double good!!!!

Last time you smelled glue and got high?
 
ONLY....
Every moment
Of every day
Of every week
Of every month
Of every year
Of every decade
Of every century

When did you last key someone's car?
 
When I performed at a birthday party with a canary yellow duck costume. I quacked over and over. Everyone stared, laughed and clapped. Asked for more. So I quacked again, over and over.

Last time you thought kissed someone good night on their lips?
 
My bucket's got a hole. Need some straw to fix it.

Last time you did something romantic?
 
I'm needed all the time.

Last time you dumped confetti into your bucket filled with orange juice, and emptied it over someone's head?
 
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