Game The Monkey’s Paw

  • Thread starter Thread starter LilithX
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Granted but your character is so hauntingly filthy you've corrupted the minds of an entire generation and will forever be know for precipitating the turning point of humankind down a spiral of depravity.

I wish I had a box of a dozen glazed crullers :p
 
Perfect!

I'm assuming those are edible, so much so that 1 is never enough?! Granted but you choke on the vert first bite ... lucky filthy Pheonixxx us about and skilled in coming up from behind people and she thrusts her pubic bone into your back repeatedly in a sordid looking act of heimlich until the morsel comes flying out and the rest of the crully thingys are swiftly stolen and devoured by your new baboon wifey!

I wish I could see through walls and all materials.
 
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PheonixxxMonroe said:
Perfect!

I'm assuming those are edible, so much so that 1 is never enough?! Granted but you choke on the vert first bite ... lucky filthy Pheonixxx us about and skilled in coming up from behind people and she thrusts her pubic bone into your back repeatedly in a sordid looking act of heimlich until the morsel comes flying out and the rest are stolen and devoured by your new baboon wifey!

I wish I could see through walls and all materials.
Click to expand...

Granted but you can't control the zoom level so all you see are molecules

I wish I could have a spa day and be preened and pampered and utterly relaxed
 
Granted but the unique experience you require turns out to be anything but tranquil when you are lead to a massage table somewhere outdoors with a balmy breeze to be slathered in Nutella only to take your blindfold off to reveal the location of your spa day is actually the baboon enclosure at the zoo.

I wish I was part feline
 
Granted but you will be what we call a Neko or Catgirl. Meaning having catlike features like ears, whiskers , paws and/or a tail. Men or women will fall in love with you and want to take you home.

I wish I was admired by a girl
 

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Nothing bad about that ... lol good luck to who ever tried to keep me as their pet! Don't they know I'm allied with @Minnie79 and she's a secret mob Queen who keeps an eye on my naughty kitty self.

Ok, granted but I hope you like horny girl baboons because @Calazviel had a fight with his primate butt stuff crush and she's now got her crazy eyes on YOU!

I wish I could do magic.
 
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Granted but you're sick every weekend after for a year..

I wish my air conditioners would put themselves away for the winter..
 
Granted, every air conditioner flew south for the winter, but they ended up loving Florida and decided to stay all year round.

I wish I could see what every lottery ticket is worth before scratching :)
 
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Granted but you have to skip the next three years and they were AWESOME!!

I wish when you order something online it would get here instantly
 
Granted but to get there that fast the packages smash into your house like bullets.

I wish that I could play the harmonica like a pro
 
Granted but you can speak anymore and playing the harmonica is your primary form of communication now

I wish I could make things happen by thought alone
 
Granted but in the alternate timeline you have to live through the outbreak of super strength STD's caused by a perfect storm of dating apps and lack of condom use, eventually Gonorrhoea and syphilis mutate to such a level they can pass without sexual contact and become totally resistant to antibiotics. The only option remaining to bathe your genitals in bleach.

I wish I stop being a lazy ass and get loads of work done this week
 
Granted but "loads" of work equates to working in a sperm collection facility as a manual load collection officer due to covid times making the machines, videos and internet that usually do the dirty work obsolete.

I wish I had a unicorn
 
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