Shitty ditties...

Spangle said:
If we wed at Gangbang Farm
Will our guests be safe from harm?
Kris has not one gun but two
What does he intend to do?
And then we have the lovely Marty
To give a speech at wedding party
Yes he is a lovely dude
I just hope he won't be rude
Amber is my bridesmaid sure
But will she eff off out the door
When PauliePaul gives her the nod
To go and sit upon his rod
Still Lakeside's here that is true
Unless she wants a piece of you
I'm so confused, I'm all agog
I think I'll marry the bloody dog!

:p
Click to expand...
Gangbang Farm will be safe and sound
No one will be hurt within its grounds
Luckily for us we have PauliePaul to thank
He's loaded Kris's guns with nothing but blanks
Im not too sure how Martys speech will be
He's plastered on bubbly and keeps going to pee
Im sure he won't be rude and continually swearing
He'll be too busy worrying about his drunken slurring
Don't worry about Amber she will stay all night
She has already got the wedding DJ in her sights
PauliePaul won't be able to tempt her to stray
His Viagra pills have been hidden away
Yes Lakeside is here but please don't knock her
It's not me she wants but the vicar... Hardrocker
So don't be confused im here to please
Join me on the tractor.. ive filled it with peas. Xx
 
MJW1234 said:
Gangbang Farm will be safe and sound
No one will be hurt within its grounds
Luckily for us we have PauliePaul to thank
He's loaded Kris's guns with nothing but blanks
Im not too sure how Martys speech will be
He's plastered on bubbly and keeps going to pee
Im sure he won't be rude and continually swearing
He'll be too busy worrying about his drunken slurring
Don't worry about Amber she will stay all night
She has already got the wedding DJ in her sights
PauliePaul won't be able to tempt her to stray
His Viagra pills have been hidden away
Yes Lakeside is here but please don't knock her
It's not me she wants but the vicar... Hardrocker
So don't be confused im here to please
Join me on the tractor.. ive filled it with peas. Xx
Click to expand...
This could be a complicated day :p love it :D
 
After the do comes the wedding night
Will I give in or will I fight?
Will I fling my dress off and boldly say
Here come get me, or STOP I'm gay!?
Will I kiss you, caress you, make you cum
Or just get pissed on coke and rum?
Will I hold you and whisper sweet words in your ear
Or stick on some porn and leave you a beer?
And what if you bring Big Blue to bed
Will I turn over and do him instead?
Oh MJ dear you think I'm frightening
That my moods are thunder and lightning
Sometimes they are that might be true
But only for exes, not for you
So as you lay there in our bed
With thoughts of me naked in your head
And showering kisses on my face
Best have Amber there, just in case...

;)
 
Spangle said:
After the do comes the wedding night
Will I give in or will I fight?
Will I fling my dress off and boldly say
Here come get me, or STOP I'm gay!?
Will I kiss you, caress you, make you cum
Or just get pissed on coke and rum?
Will I hold you and whisper sweet words in your ear
Or stick on some porn and leave you a beer?
And what if you bring Big Blue to bed
Will I turn over and do him instead?
Oh MJ dear you think I'm frightening
That my moods are thunder and lightning
Sometimes they are that might be true
But only for exes, not for you
So as you lay there in our bed
With thoughts of me naked in your head
And showering kisses on my face
Best have Amber there, just in case...

;)
Click to expand...
Fantastic Spangle a real classic I'll hopefully reply when I can lol... Thank you ️xx
 
Spangle said:
After the do comes the wedding night
Will I give in or will I fight?
Will I fling my dress off and boldly say
Here come get me, or STOP I'm gay!?
Will I kiss you, caress you, make you cum
Or just get pissed on coke and rum?
Will I hold you and whisper sweet words in your ear
Or stick on some porn and leave you a beer?
And what if you bring Big Blue to bed
Will I turn over and do him instead?
Oh MJ dear you think I'm frightening
That my moods are thunder and lightning
Sometimes they are that might be true
But only for exes, not for you
So as you lay there in our bed
With thoughts of me naked in your head
And showering kisses on my face
Best have Amber there, just in case...

;)
Click to expand...
The wedding night for us could be a real worry
Especially if the menu earlier is baked bean curry
Your dress may fly off but not for our loving to start
But simply that you can no longer hold in a big beany fart
I hope you don't say you're gay but just want to please
Just so we can share a juicy kiss tasting of mushy peas
But whatever you feel for you is the right thing to do
Im more than willing to share you with the tractor Big Blue
If it makes you feel better im willing to change into a girl
Grow my hair long, wear your bloomers and be known as Michelle.
To give you Dutch courage in bed you can drink rum and coke
In the hope you get pissed, get randy and start fancying a bloke
It will drive me crazy if in my ear i feel your warm breath
Hoping you don't regurgitate a pea in my ear making me deaf
Spangle im not scared of your moods of lightning and thunder
But wary if you get too drunk and cover me in baked bean chunder
If you want to shag myself and Big Blue please may I be first
Because being in bed after he's ejaculated oil will be the worst
I look forward to bed as your more sexually experienced as an old un
Just please don't shit on my face or give me a shower that's golden
I agree if she's willing Amber can be part of our wedding night plan
But im not as keen on Marty and Kris being there with a web cam
I never want to make you mad like some of your exes do
But to live happily ever after on our farm with Big Blue
Whatever happens Spangle my bride I know we will be happy
Even when your 90 and I have to regularly change your nappy :):)️xx
 
MJW1234 said:
The wedding night for us could be a real worry
Especially if the menu earlier is baked bean curry
Your dress may fly off but not for our loving to start
But simply that you can no longer hold in a big beany fart
I hope you don't say you're gay but just want to please
Just so we can share a juicy kiss tasting of mushy peas
But whatever you feel for you is the right thing to do
Im more than willing to share you with the tractor Big Blue
If it makes you feel better im willing to change into a girl
Grow my hair long, wear your bloomers and be known as Michelle.
To give you Dutch courage in bed you can drink rum and coke
In the hope you get pissed, get randy and start fancying a bloke
It will drive me crazy if in my ear i feel your warm breath
Hoping you don't regurgitate a pea in my ear making me deaf
Spangle im not scared of your moods of lightning and thunder
But wary if you get too drunk and cover me in baked bean chunder
If you want to shag myself and Big Blue please may I be first
Because being in bed after he's ejaculated oil will be the worst
I look forward to bed as your more sexually experienced as an old un
Just please don't shit on my face or give me a shower that's golden
I agree if she's willing Amber can be part of our wedding night plan
But im not as keen on Marty and Kris being there with a web cam
I never want to make you mad like some of your exes do
But to live happily ever after on our farm with Big Blue
Whatever happens Spangle my bride I know we will be happy
Even when your 90 and I have to regularly change your nappy :):)️xx
Click to expand...
Wow.. that IS impressive. Well done you! :p
 
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