Not wishing to add to the more serious poetry thread...add your shitty ditties here There was a boy named Brad Who was quite a cheeky lad He lived in Kidderminster With his poor old mum and dad He didn't learn to read and write He couldn't add, his grades were shite In fact it's not unfair to say He really wasn't over bright His dad said "Brad, you are a knob" (At which his mother let out a sob) "Go get your idle arse into town "You're twenty now, go get a job" So keen to see what fortune brings Upstairs he went to pack his things His wallet, his fone, his free buss pass And a pack of yummy cheesy strings But on the bus, or so I've heard He sat next to a hot young bird She flashed her boobs and rubbed his thigh And then the usual thing occurred He couldn't stop it, though he tried The girl looked down and "ohh" she sighed She whipped her pants off there and then And happily she sat astride "Oh Brad" she said (not being coy) "You certainly are one big boy" With that she bounced upon his lap Until she screamed with joy Brad shot his load with a curse "Dear boy" she said "I've sure had worse" She pulled her pants back on again And took a tenner from her purse Well from then on the ladies thus Queued for miles to ride that bus And Brad had such a big smile that The money, he thought, was just a plus!
My naughty cock is always getting up, I tell it, no not again but wants to stand up. I say, you know I'm all alone and no pussy around. When has that stopped you before... Just turn on some porn and you know I like the back door. I find some whore who wants it more that gets down on all four. I start stroking up and down and have fun in my playground. As I get ready to cum, I lay down. I start to explode and should be the talk of the town but for me it's a ghost town that I'll always be around.
Lol good effort Poor jodagr that's quite a tale Of your cock's little fail Perhaps dip the scoundrel into ice And make that fellow play more nice I know...shocking right?
Hello and welcome little toots Kneel before me, lick my boots Slide your lips along the heel Try and imagine the pain you'll feel Don't look at me you little scum I'll thrash your slutty little bum Fetch my crop from off the shelf Don't you dare piss yourself I'll make you lick that gusset clean But no not yet, don't be so keen I'll put those shackles on your wrist Give your nipple a cruel twist I'll bind you, gag you, make you heave Torture you with no reprieve I'll thrash you soundly in every place Except that filthy street whore's face I'll fuck your mouth, I'll fuck your ass I'll make you drink piss from a glass You're worthless, useless, look at you And after this you're penniless too...
Let me touch these tities, Let me kiss this sexy mouth. Let me lie with you in bed, Gently gently going south M not even rhyming
I am Miss Kendra The cock tease And with my hands I aim to please I'll squeeze your cock Just for fun I'll even let you Rub your penis Against my bum In the park I blew A studly guy Just for fun But never Ever Do I allow Men to cum! They groan and moan Until their balls ache But letting them Orgasm? No, "For goodness sake!" No spurting of cream Will be allowed I am a tease queen And I humbly take a bow well this one's a copy paste
I was taking care of my pussy, she got sick so I had to stay up all night stroking her and rubbing her stiff bits...at one point she was drenched so I had to bathe her..
I'll stand at your window Watch you have sex Steam up the panes with my ragged breath I'm sat down beside you On the tube or the bus Pretend to tie laces while I look up your dress I'm the breath on your neck As you queue in a line I'll peer down your cleavage with drool on my chin I'll hide in your toilets Peer through a crack Stare as you pee, feel the excitement begin I'm a voyeur A watcher I'm everywhere I see you I stalk you I don't fucking care
