Advice and Opinion Ask a woman

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Insensitive and a jerk is never appealing, degrading depends.

Online, a man who is directly sexual, and goes further than one might want in real life, can be exciting but also - to me at least - less worrying because the attachment can be only sexual whereas a real relationship that goes beyond sex carries much more risk, emotionally and of spilling over into real life.
But that spillage can be incredibly sexual as well, and potentially toxic. Lol
 
Is this hypothetical 42 year old man kind to his mother, or just squatting in her home because he doesn't know what else to do? ;)
It is an insanely trivial point, living in a parent's home, in finding someone attractive, interesting, relationship worthy. Life has all kinds of twists and turns, prospective partners get that or they don't.
No I would never do that to my mum! I have far too much respect for her to take advantage of her in that way. In fact I have spoken to her about it and she asked me to stay as I help her out both financially and physically but I feel it’s a source of contention for potential partners. I get what your saying @FireflyEyes and if only everyone was as cool and realistic as you then that would be a great world to live in. My thing is also do I want someone who is so materialistic that they need someone who has everything to offer them right now instead of finding someone who can offer them that in the long run as well as what I can offer them in myself as opposed to someone who wants me the for what I can offer them right now. It’s a difficult situation as I can afford to buy a place quicker if I stay here but have my independence if I rent but it takes longer to buy. It’s a hard choice
 
For me, it would be a major turn off. I am attracted to men who have their shit together, meaning I respect independence and a good hustle. If I was in the same circumstance, I would have came up with an alternate plan i.e hotel, rental property, apartments, room mates etc. Something temporary until you buy a new house (Sorry if this sounds bitchy lol). I just think its super easy to go running back to mommy and daddy when your down and out and I prefer difficult men ;)
I respect your opinion and no I don’t think it’s bitchy although I did leave out a few details in my original post in that my mum is disabled and my dad died two years ago and his last proper conversation with me was to take care of my mum. I also lived an hour from my mum which prevented from doing that. Yes I could once the lockdown is over afford to rent a place but to what extent, paying someone else’s mortgage while saving half against my own for a woman who is so self absorbed that she can’t see past a son being there for a parent? I’m not sure I would want to be with someone like that in truth! Sorry if that seems bitchy in return but I was looking for more valid points I suppose than get your shit together when in all honesty I do and feel I’m taking the more intelligent route. But that being said it did answer a question and I appreciate that in that I will stick to online relationships until such time as I have my shit together
 
I have spoken to her about it and she asked me to stay as I help her out both financially and physically but I feel it’s a source of contention for potential partners.
There was a time, most of the world over, when multi-generational housing was the norm. In many parts of the world it still is. That having a relationship isn't just about that person, but also all the people connected to that person, siblings, cousins, parents and so on. We can try to fool ourselves and believe that the world that matters ends at the end of our fingertips...but a fully connected relationship, families can be knitted together to become so much stronger than one formed by fingertips. (The fact is, at some point everyone needs a little help...or a lot of help...weak inter-generational relations lead to resentment, scorn and a lack of care)

But I suppose that all depends on what kind of relationship is desired.
 
There was a time, most of the world over, when multi-generational housing was the norm. In many parts of the world it still is. That having a relationship isn't just about that person, but also all the people connected to that person, siblings, cousins, parents and so on. We can try to fool ourselves and believe that the world that matters ends at the end of our fingertips...but a fully connected relationship, families can be knitted together to become so much stronger than one formed by fingertips. (The fact is, at some point everyone needs a little help...or a lot of help...weak inter-generational relations lead to resentment, scorn and a lack of care)

But I suppose that all depends on what kind of relationship is desired.
Agreed in total, I now see myself as the patriarch of my family and as sexist as that might seem I have a disabled mother and sister with two nephews at 21 and 18 and and my sister has a wayward husband with as much interest in his kids as I have in horse manure. I don’t take it as granted but will never want to stop being there for my family. I do see what you are saying and have seen in other cultures that living together in a full household can work but I’m not of those cultures. I just wish people would respect what I’m going through. I suppose though it’s easier to explain here than on some obscure dating site that allows you to blank someone without explanation or reason and let’s face it in this day and age is now apparently how you meet someone. Man do I miss bars and clubs lol
 
Ok so here is one that I need a bit of feedback on.
Would you date a guy who is 42 but living with his mother? I’ll qualify that with a bit of a back story. I’ve just split up with my wife and left her with the house, but due to the world being on fire lol yes I’m quoting you @Busty_Nerd the house has no equity in it so selling would be a mistake as we would be due the bank money. We had no children so it’s been quite an amicable split but I’m back to square one basically. I’m a self employed joiner and make good money but unfortunately due to lockdown am unable to work, I have a government contract working in local housing but they can’t let me in. Once back I plan to save to buy a home but financially it makes sense to remain at my mums in order to save more faster. So what would you think if you met a guy under those circumstances, would you be interested or would you run for the hills?
Thanks in advance ladies a appreciate any feedback

Honestly, depends on the situation. I probably wouldn't mind if you're independent, have privacy, plan on moving out soon (as in a temporary situation) or if you're a caretaker to a disabled parent or something (even though that may be an issue down the line, but I'd be understanding or that situation) I wouldn't run exactly, but it would depend on how much I liked that person and how difficult it would be to date that person. What would our dates be like, would we have any privacy, what the future would look like for us. The truth is since covid, lots of people are in this situation right now, and I wouldn't fault anyone for being here right now. But honestly, I'd probably run "run for the hills" because you're divorced/divorcing more than living with your parents because I find people who just got out of something that major have significant baggage and are dealing with a lot. And I probably wouldn't want to date someone like that as a single person who has never been married (but that isn't relevant to your question and is neither here nor there)
 
Ok so here is one that I need a bit of feedback on.
Would you date a guy who is 42 but living with his mother? I’ll qualify that with a bit of a back story. I’ve just split up with my wife and left her with the house, but due to the world being on fire lol yes I’m quoting you @Busty_Nerd the house has no equity in it so selling would be a mistake as we would be due the bank money. We had no children so it’s been quite an amicable split but I’m back to square one basically. I’m a self employed joiner and make good money but unfortunately due to lockdown am unable to work, I have a government contract working in local housing but they can’t let me in. Once back I plan to save to buy a home but financially it makes sense to remain at my mums in order to save more faster. So what would you think if you met a guy under those circumstances, would you be interested or would you run for the hills?
Thanks in advance ladies a appreciate any feedback
I think if you explained the situation and showed that you did have plans it wouldn’t be an issue. Everyone has stuff going on, especially now.
 
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What's your favorite method of relaxation?
Exercise. Which is my favorite way to play. And I find playing very relaxing. Especially exercise that involves twisting, as twisting your body is one of the best ways to stimulate endorphin release and hormone regulation. Very relaxing. Shoveling snow. Doing yoga. Cycling. Other activities that get the heartrate up ;).

And of course if someone with fingers is available to indulge me, back tickles.
 
Exercise. Which is my favorite way to play. And I find playing very relaxing. Especially exercise that involves twisting, as twisting your body is one of the best ways to stimulate endorphin release and hormone regulation. Very relaxing. Shoveling snow. Doing yoga. Cycling. Other activities that get the heartrate up ;).

And of course if someone with fingers is available to indulge me, back tickles.


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