sometimes it feels so hard to get to that point, where you say enough is enough, your mind plays tricks on you saying everything will be okay and then you get punished in a way by making the choice to simply do what is best for yourself.
this is about relationships i know, but when i got my IUD (the side effects from nuva were just too scary for me so) my then gynaecologist took "liberties" he wasn't supposed to, or maybe it just felt that way to me, either way i felt incredibly uncomfortable. a few weeks ago i had a pap and a PE on the same day and i had to be incredibly demanding to get a referral to someone else, its not in my nature to be so persistent or demanding but reaching the end of my tether, just spoke out. Now i have a lovely new gynaecologist & she is just so much more amenable, when i have questions, there aren't any silly questions, there's no judgement either.
That first step to where you want to be feels like trying to leap over a mountain, but its worth it.